Rational Reactions to Challenging Situations

By: Roz Jones

Rational and reasonable, at least linguistically, are synonymous. In fact, Webster uses these words to help define each other.

Rational- Having or exercising the ability to reason: Of sound mind: Consistent with or based on reason (Webster’s New Riverside University Dictionary, 1984).

Reason: Within the bounds of common sense. Not extreme or excessive. The capacity for rational thought, inference, or discrimination (Websters New Riverside University Dictionary, 1984)

Our emotions are a reflection of our perceptions of what’s going on around us, and in turn they lead us to externally display one or more patterns of behavior in reaction to that stimuli. In any given situation, our emotions are going to have an impact in how we react.

When these situations are especially challenging it can be difficult to maintain rational thought patterns and behavior within the confines of reason; as portrayed by Portia.

If this were true, then should I know this secret.

I grant I am a woman; but withal

A woman that Lord Brutus took to wife:

I grant I am a woman; but withal

A woman well-reputed, Cato’s daughter.

Think you I am no stronger than my sex,

Being so father’d and so husbanded?

Tell me your counsels, I will not disclose ’em:

I have made strong proof of my constancy,

Giving myself a voluntary wound

Here, in the thigh: can I bear that with patience.

And not my husband’s secrets?

(The Tragedy Of Julius Caesar. (n.d.). Retrieved from Opensource Shakespeare: http://www.opensourceshakespeare.org/views/plays/play_view.php?WorkID=juliuscaesar&Act=2&Scene=1&Scope=scene)

Even though stabbing yourself in the leg is neither reasonable nor recommended, this one scene of Portia’s highlights the major points of remaining rational during a challenging situation.

Remaining calm in a high-pressure situation
Maintain rational detachment
Be attentive
Recognize your limits
Be mindful of your own actions

Remain calm

Notice how Portia isn’t yelling and screaming at Brutus. She’s completely calm. She knows Brutus is up to something because she can clearly see the effect it’s having on him physically, how it’s weighing him down, so when she confronts Brutus and puts herself in this situation, she remains completely calm.

Maintain rational detachment

Portia refers to her breeding and her choice of husband here as well. She’s calmly bringing up her, basically, credentials as she sees them. She has some authority here, though not very much, but she’s using what she has rather than taking the situation personally. Although she speaks about how Brutus’s treatment of her is affecting her personally, she’s not expressing that in an overtly emotional way in this particular scene.

Portia is attempting to diffuse a situation that Brutus is in, and she know that if she reacts emotionally to the personal hurt, then she’ll get nowhere. Instead, she states her case with a degree of rational detachment.

Be Attentive

Portia chose this particular moment in the garden with Brutus because she thought it to be a good time to address their situation. She’s mindful of her surroundings, and attentive to his current situation.

Recognize your limits

Portia understands the limits of her standing as a woman in her society. Rather than making herself out to be too important to leave out of the equation, she pleads her case with Brutus by shining a light on her social and physical limitations, or rather, her limits as Brutus may see them as a man- even if she does mock his point of view just a tad bit.

When she stabs herself in the leg, she recognizes that it’s painful, and addresses this fact in an attempt to portray her rational state of mind as a strength. Her use of her physical and social limits reflects a stoic, and rational, state of mind even though she’s probably very distraught.

Be mindful of your own actions.

Again, Portia is mindful of the fact that she’s basically ambushed Brutus just before he’s about to do something regretful. She doesn’t know exactly what he’s involved in, but she does have a feeling that it’s something horrible.

She’s completely mindful of her actions of ambushing Brutus, kneeling at his feet to beg, using every one of her tools in her arsenal to convince him to succumb to her will, even stabbing herself. At every phase she remains completely calm, and rational in her thoughts and actions.

Rational thinking is the ability to consider all of the relevant variables in any given situation. Reacting rationally implies that your actions are a direct result of rational thought, even if some actions seem unreasonable.

Portia’s display of feminine wiles in this scene depicts the Stoic philosophy of her day, and although it’s a play, it’s a perfect example of all of the components of rational behavior during challenging situations.

Obviously, stabbing yourself is never reasonable. Remember that this is an artistic expression from Shakespeare, so certain components were included with the express purpose of highlighting the mistakes Brutus made. However, the principal stands. Rational behavior is best deployed in highly stressful situations, even if others like Brutus, do not behave rationally themselves.

How Better Self-Care Can Lead To Success

By: Roz Jones

Self-care is often brushed aside for things seen as more important; business meetings, social commitments, family obligations. While these things are important (and can in some cases contribute to self-care), it is important that we take time to ourselves when we need it. This personal investment will not be for nothing; in fact, self-care is important if we want to optimize our performance in any area of our lives. Taking the time to maintain our physical, emotional and mental health can lead to success in many ways.

Helps us to maintain perspective

Self-care, regardless of the form, allows us the time to reflect and therefore better understand ourselves as individuals. We are better able to identify our triggers and put things in to perspective, rearranging our priorities to understand what is important and what isn’t. This perspective contributes to a healthier life as we understand where stress is justified and where we should be more relaxed.

Helps us to keep positive

Self-care is great for our mental and emotional wellbeing. People who invest time in taking care of themselves are more likely to be more optimistic and see the silver linings in bad situations. It is an effective way for maintaining positive moods, rather than succumbing to darker emotions.

Improves our relationships

By investing time in ourselves, we are better placed to interact with and support others. Self-care allows us to maintain our own health and therefore put us in a good place to be able to engage with others and maintain strong relationships.

Improves our work performance

While self-care is sometimes seen as indulgent, it often has a much broader impact that goes beyond our own lives. People who invest in self-care are more likely to be healthier, both physically and mentally, and are therefore better prepared to perform at work. They are likely to be more focused, more emotionally stable and form stronger, more positive relationships. All of these things are highly beneficial in the workplace and will lead to greater performance.

It does take time to invest in self-care, although the benefits far outweigh the price. Take the time to establish a good routine that includes self-care practices, whatever this looks like to you, and you will be sure to reap the rewards. Self-care is an important component of maintaining good health and should not be overlooked or disregarded.

Five Signs That You are Not Deserving

By: Roz Jones

Everyone deserves to enjoy a fulfilling life. This statement rings true no matter what circumstances, and this article is not one that is going to agree that a person exists who does not deserve to be fulfilled. Rather, this article is a guide to recognizing a negative mental state. Someone who does not feel that they deserve to find joy is someone who is suffering. If these five signs describe you, then it is time to change your outlook on life. Read on to discover the five signs that you may be struggling with your self-worth.

You Tend to Be Negative and Ungrateful

People who struggling to believe that they deserve the best in life tend to be fairly pessimistic. They fail to acknowledge positives in their lives, instead choosing to focus on everything that goes wrong. This cyclical thinking quickly derails an ability to appreciate the success in your life.

If this describes you, then I urge you to start by finding one positive aspect of each day and focus on that aspect. Over time, try to find two things and then three. Ultimately, I challenge you to replace your negative thinking with grateful thinking. Changing your mindset is possible, even if done through baby steps.

You Have No Boundaries

Often, people who struggle with self-worth struggle with sticking to boundaries. If you find that other people run over you then you may need to set up some boundaries. People will only treat you as well as you teach them to treat you.

By setting up boundaries, you are setting up relationships for success. Do not let others talk down to you, remember, you are worth something. You deserve happiness and joy. Letting others run over you is not going to bring you closer to joy.

You Do Not Take Care of Yourself

Taking care of yourself is hard. Many of us spend far too much time taking care of others and we lose sight of ourselves in the process. You have to take care of yourself in order to be the best version of you.

This starts with eating right and getting exercise. You do not have to join a gym and count calories to do these things. Start by being just a little more mindful of your choices and see how that makes you feel. You may find that you like fueling your body just a tad bit more healthfully.

Also, make sure that you are doing what you need to do in the mental health department. Remember, you are not alone if you are struggling with your self-worth, isolation, anxiety, or depression. These are common. Talk to someone about them.

You Apologize Too Much

If you find yourself apologizing for things that you know are absolutely not your fault, then you may be struggling with your self-worth. Stop apologizing for things that are not your fault. Remember, people will only treat you as well as you teach them to treat you.

You Are Isolated or Push People Away

If you have isolated yourself from your friends or family members, then this is a good sign that you are sabotaging your own happiness. This is a common occurrence for people who are struggling to believe that they deserve good things. All of these doubts, though, are coming from you.

More likely than not, your family and friends want to be close to you again. They care about how you are doing and they want to help you through this. Reach out to one of them through text. Invite them for coffee or out to see a movie.

Your friendships are an important part of your emotional health. Having friends to lean on can make a major difference in your self-esteem.

Can Exercise Improve Your Focus & Concentration?

By: Roz Jones

As caregivers it is easy to forget or remain focused when you are taking care of a loved one. So how can you get back on track. Simply put, physical exercise is beneficial to just about every aspect of the body. Everything from improved heart health, weight management, increased vitality and, of course, looking better in the mirror are all side effects of a consistent exercise routine.

However, the benefits available through exercise go much further than skin deep. Challenging your body physically also has the ability to greatly improve your cognitive function and brain health.

If you tend to struggle with focus and concentration, you are certainly not alone. Today’s society is more distracted than ever before. Every waking hour of the day (and even while you sleep), there are phone notifications, noisy neighbors and a long list of other distractions all competing for your attention.

While you may never have considered exercise as a viable method of improving your ability to focus, this article will support this notion with several research studies that should change your mind.

In a study performed on a group of Dutch students, researchers used objective measures to gauge the attention span of students after dividing them into three groups. One group of students performed two twenty-minute bouts of moderate exercise intermittently during their morning lessons, another group was allowed one twenty minute exercise session, while the third group remained seated throughout the same time period.

As you can probably guess, the groups that were allowed to exercise scored significantly higher on attention span assessments, with the first group scoring even higher than the students exercising for only one session.

Another study supporting the use of exercise to improve focus and concentration was conducted in 2007 using students in Massachusetts. For the sake of brevity, this study concluded that students receiving at least 56 hours of physical exercise each school year scored higher than their peers who only performed 28 hours of exercise.

This is an interesting proponent of the idea that physical exercise should remain an integral part of the education system. Usually, supporters of this idea state the rising levels of obesity and diabetes in school-aged individuals is the primary reason for including physical activity throughout the school year. While this is certainly an issue, the cognitive benefits available to students who exercise more is a strong argument as well.

The website, Positive Psychology, describes how physical activity triggers a biological response in the brain that improves focus and concentration. During exercise, the brain releases a chemical known as BDNF, which is known to be responsible for nourishing brain cells and allowing new neural pathways to form inside the brain.

Furthermore, regular exercise increases a neurotransmitter known as norepinephrine. This results in a heightened sense of alertness, energy, and concentration.

In conclusion, the human body is designed to remain in motion. The term, “use it or lose it,” is an extremely applicable way to describe how without exercise, many important aspects of our anatomy suffer.

While the purpose of this article is to illustrate the fact that you can certainly improve your focus and concentration by dedicating some time in your schedule to get moving, the benefits of physical activity are critical to your quality of life as a whole.

If you are looking for a great way to overcome the never-ending flurry of distractions present in your life that can also nourish your body as a whole, get into the habit of giving your body the physical activity that it requires.

Works Cited

10 Neurological Benefits of Exercise. (2020, April 16). Retrieved from https://positivepsychology.com/exercise-neurological-benefits/ 

Can You Improve Concentration Through Exercise? – EuroPace. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.europace.org/can-you-improve-concentration-through-exercise/ 

How physical exercise makes your brain work better. (2016, June 18). Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/education/2016/jun/18/how-physical-exercise-makes-your-brain-work-better 

5 Key Tenets of Self-Care

By: Roz Jones

As a caregiver are you at practicing self-care? Self-care entails taking the time to manage our individual physical, mental and emotional wellness. Good self-care habits are essential in terms of how we view ourselves and our ability to interact with others.

You may be very good at taking care of others but how good are you at caring for yourself? Self-care is a component of our physical and mental wellness that we do not discuss enough. It requires us to be quite deliberate in how we go about taking care of yourself which can feel selfish and, on some levels, overwhelming.

When was the last time you took a day or even a week off to decompress and explore the meaning of life? We often store our days and guard them like gold, preserving them for times of illness or family vacation days. Self-care practitioners challenge themselves on this philosophy. They focus on finding a healthy balance that allows for self-preservation without sacrificing all of the other things they hold as being equally important such as family, career, and community.

Practicing self-care allows us to be there in the way they want to be for others.

How Do You Know if Your Failing at Self-Care

Some tell-tale signs that you might be failing in the self-care department include feelings of being stressed, feeling burned out and poor physical health. Illnesses are often taxing on your body to the point you are forced to take time away from work, and it can take quite a while to recharge after such an event.

Another sign that you may be failing in the realm of self-care is if you rarely allow others to do something for you. Self-care can also mean having the skillset to enable others to take the reins of a situation while you take a break or focus on other tasks that need your attention.

Tenets of Self-Care

According to Psychology Today, proper self-care can create a pathway to you better managing your stress and ultimately living your best life. It can serve as armor that protects the energy that is necessary for your survival.

Here are five tenets to put you on course to practicing better self-care.

Know When Just to Say ‘No’

As humans, we all have limits in our capabilities. Taking on more than we can do for an extended period can wear you down, draining you, robbing you of your ability to be creative and effective in other ways ranging from the workplace to your home life.

Practicing self-care requires you to establish clear boundaries on behalf of yourself with others who may or may not have your best interests at heart.

Schedule Self-Care Activities

Self-care does not just happen spontaneously. You have to schedule the time and actively commit to seeing those plans through to the end. Additionally, you may have to ensure others are aware of your plans to ensure they don’t unknowingly push you to put their needs ahead of yours.

Make Sleep and Rest a Priority

Sleep may not seem like a stand-alone tenet, but you should not underestimate the necessity of recharging your body. Sleep, rest, relaxation, and meditation can all contribute to replenishing your body and giving it a much-needed restoration period.

Additionally, it helps to keep your mind sharp and can also aid in allowing you to sustain a healthy mood and outlook on life and interacting with others.

Find Fitness

If fitness is not your strong point, look for ways to naturally incorporate some form of fitness into your day. Challenge yourself to find something you find joy in doing whether it’s going for walks, swimming, kickboxing, dancing around your home solo or finding a Zumba class to get you moving. Self-care is not only about getting adequate rest, taking a day off or keeping your doctor’s appointments. It’s also about helping your body to stay fit.

Socialize with Others

Socialize with others. Self-care can also be about tending to those relationships that make us feel good. Healthy relationships are essential for our emotional and physical well-being. We all get busy from time to time and incorporating our friends and family into our busy schedule can seem impossible. However, our connections are a must-have. Look for ways to nurture those relationships –even if it means becoming the organizer of those get-togethers.

Take the time today to assess your life and whether or not you are practicing self-care. You don’t have to make sweeping changes all at once if you find a few areas are lacking. Target a single area at a time and make small adjustments. You will be amazed by the overall improvement that begins to take hold of your life.